Do you experience emotional detachment on behalf of your spouse or partner? Do you majorly talk only about kids, schedules or managing the home? Does your partner not spend quality time with you? Are you avoiding intimacy?
It is an aspect of all relationships. It develops slowly and is not noticeable initially. It becomes noticeable only when the gulf is much broader. There are a number of factors, that lead up to emotional drifting. It may involve either or both of the partners.
A number of couples do not get much time for themselves. This is especially the case when they have young children. In some cases, couples try and figure out alone time for themselves by wearing headphones, watching sitcoms, spending time over the internet or their phones.
If this is your story, tell your partner that you need some alone time and figure out ways to find it. It is best to make a reciprocal arrangement, wherein both partners find time for themselves.
When encountered with high levels of emotional distress, people tend to withdraw. So if you figure out that your partner’s life is marked with obvious stressors, ask them how they make him/her feel. Then you can talk about probable ways to reduce stress.
Are you coming to figure out that your partner no longer invests energy for the family, home or marriage the way they used to earlier do? Is your life lagging in intimacy? Are the communication levels low? Have you been emotionally drifted for long?
You need to decide upon a time to talk. Do not make a casual talk. Instead, discuss about the relationship. Ask your partner how he/she feels. Figure out the things that you would want to have changed in a relationship. This will make you feel more connected. But before you respond, you must understand your partner’s perspective. While this is very difficult, it is important as well.
When your partner feels that you are a needy person, they will take an emotional step back. But this will make you feel abandoned, rejected and worried. So it makes you even more needier. Then your partner takes another step back.
And you will become needier still. The way around it is to take a step back for a short duration of time and stop feeling needy. Your partner will become available and you can break the cycle.
Being emotionally distant makes one critical and resentful. You express to your partner that they are insufficient. So your partner withdraws to avoid situations. This increases your own distress and the cycle continues. This is avoided by keeping communications positive.
It is likely that your partner had a troubled childhood. That is why they do not mind getting emotionally distant. The right way to overcome the situation is by treating your partner with patience and care.
There are cases wherein a partner may be detached because another important obligation has come up in their life which they need to take care of for the time being. This may be a family obligation or a health concern. Alternately, your partner may be pursuing education.
When people have been separated by physical distances, they tend to stay emotionally detached for the time being. Things change for the better over time.
Workaholics have a tendency towards emotional detachment. They are happier during weekends and holidays.
Partners sometimes withhold affection to let their partners open up and become more loving.